scribblings

All day i sit in front of a comp, checking emails, listening to music, reading stuff related to research, music, every other crap i get intersted in, writing things, doing math, doing experiments, blah blah blah...

I go on walks, talk to people, sing myself (very badly) somtimes...

Whatever i do, at the end of the day, if i sit down and analyse why i do all this and for what i do all this? i end up finding no answer. It all leads into a blank space.

Well do i do things for getting a Ph D? or for getting Food, Shelter and Clothing? or is it for anything else which i can define as a possible goal?

While thinking of it all, none of these questions individually or collectively reach anywhere closer to giving a fulfilling answer. There still is a huge blank beyond all these questions as to one lives.

Where does my life lead me?

to become a Ph D doctor?

and then?

more research and/or teach?

and then?

it goes on and on.. for every question and answer there will be an and then? right after it.

and then?