Sunday, March 05, 2006

A la Carte

One fine evening some time last week, on my way back from my usual evening walk, i decided to not try my luck at Mess for grub and decided to eat at Sangeetha. On my way back, 4th wing gumbal said, there was a frog found in the shit rice they served at godav.

Since quite a long time now, i have been hoping that mess food would atleast be close to something eatable atleast today. Hope Floats. The plot of quality of food against the time of the days is an exponential decay function. Breakfast is by far the best they make, atleast on the days i eat breakfast. This has become fairly regular of late, coz i m auditing a course in A Slot and hence grub in mess before i go to class. Though lesser, the lunch is atleast something u can close ur eyes and nose and just swallow down the throat. Here, I must borrow the following expression used in a recent tamil movie to give a better description.

"yellow water in the name of dal, dal water in the name of sambar, cow's urine in the name of rasam, paper in the name of papad..." and the list goes on.


Dinner is the least palatable. See the above plot to get a complete picture. The circadian rhythms are completely followed in the behaviour, within allowed error limits. I have never been able to eat fully the infinitisimally small amount of food i serve on my plate for dinner. Almost every other day, i help myself to some restaurant in the city or somebody invites me to a free dinner somewhere. And now, the feather in the crown is this Frog Biriyani.

Oh did i forget, the Mess Authorities have tried a new receipe for the non-vegetarians who would suffer the absence of chicken in the fear of 'Avian Influenza'. So what else would they try and innovate in making new dishes. Let me speculate.

Now that there are even reports of mammals being affected, Reptiles would have to be used for substituting the Aves. Cockroach will be one of the important things used in the cuisine. The legs and Antennae for garnishing and decorating. Frogs and Toads will go as substituent for Chicken. One could use Lizard for the occasional delicacy. Of course, Pythons are always there for the main course, with apples stuffed in their mouth. It could of course be a sinful combo of any of the above mentioned stuff and yeah, if u suddenly notice your wing cat or pup missing, dont ever worry, its gonna be happily sleeping in the oven to get to your dinner plate. Not to forget the special, Bugs special receipe, Witch Sandwitch.

I am not going to describe more and cause nausea to many a reader, so me stops here. The post however, could have a second part...

Obligatory Piece of Information (not worth even the two paise): this post and the one before on Treat, are non-identical twins. This one was conceived first and hence, abiding laws of nature was born later than its twin.

Keep at it, da.:). It's good fun grossing-out people. See me - I used to be gross, now I'm gross-er.:P.
I heard about this accidental culinary innovation from a guy in my hostel. Thank god I got out of IITM in good health, or maybe it was the old dictum that what you don't know cannot hurt you.

It should be termed "allah" carte, because it is only by god's grace that people are alive in spite of all the shit that goes into the making of the mess grub.
IIT food was bad...but in my time, it never went down to such levels. And this is after privatisation of the mess and all....worst.
by far the grossest post i have read , barring this .....:)
God only can save you !!

Cant say anything more ! But can imagine your vettiness plot a graph and all awesome machan !!
true..lets see what mr.himalaya has in store for us..

PS:you have too many vetties reading your blod :-p
There are still different ways of looking at it; people in other parts of South Asia pay through their noses for these insect delicacies. Even with the increased rate, we get a great deal when compared to their costs, right?

(But in reality, yaak! I shudder at the thought of insects in my food...)
shamanth, i dont wanna become grosser da.

Su, yeah da, god's grace only.

Baada, the supi apparently offered the guy who found the frog a free icecream to not tell the thingy to anybody.

leftit, did u actually read thro' the shit u have linked, i couldnt beyond 3 lines

alwaysvetti, well it takes a couple of min to do a plot on any of the softwares...

njiggs, i quote myself, hope floats.

kmap, avalukku pudichirukku thingattum. namma oorla idhellam sari varuma???
Dude this is not the first culinary innovation! there was a cockroach found in ganga mess last year i guess..
if there are a couple of beer bottles found there is a huge fracas and hullabaloo by the dean but such things are simply pushed under the carpet..

PS: Me a 1st timer to ur blog.I am Rajeev{DESI,140,Jam} and added you a few months back in OI.And i dont drink beer :P
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